There's no place like Rome, there's no place like Rome, there's no place...

And I hope that by clicking my heels together I can get back there. So I just tried and it didn't work. Pity. While the Lufthansa flight was a good deal (less than 100Euro for the round trip), that would have been even better.

Rose and I got there on St. Pat's day of all days. Were we surprised to see lots of people wearin' the green on Piazza Navona where we went for dinner. We later discovered there had been a world championship rugby match between Ireland and Italy that day which explained a lot.

We had found a cheap hotel by the train station on the internet. It was clean. The coffee at breakfast was fabulous. It was really close to the Termini (station) where you can catch any buses, trains or subways you need. Otherwise, it was pretty much of a dump but better than lots of other places I'm stayed . We payed 90 Euros for both of us for the weekend nights and 80 during the week. A nicer place down the street was charging 240 per night for a double.

We got there so late on Saturday that the only thing to do was to go out to eat. So we found a bus that went to this plaza recommended in Rick Steves' 2005 guide I had. (I was too cheap to buy a new guide book so got this outdated one on Amazon.) We got off the bus and I cleverly thought that when we wanted to go back we would just get on the same bus and ride it through the whole route until it doubled back to Termini. The piazza was hopping with people from everywhere including what sounded like some Irish. We had a nice dinner outside with some of the red wine (I mean it was Rome so green beer didn't seem right) we drank throughout the trip and wandered back and got on the bus. We had mass transit tickets good for a week (14Euro) we bought at a tobacco/newspaper stand in the station so we could ride at will. So the bus went one or two more stops and then the driver stopped and shoed us off as it was clearly the end of the line. Our first adventure! Lost in Rome! At night! (It's really not that dramatic because we COULD have always taken a cab back to our hotel but that would have been admitting failure.) I had noticed the bus driver had gone around the corner to a busy street after throwing us off. We headed over there and guess what? There was a number 40 bus, the same number we had been on, parked and waiting for passengers. We got back on and rode back and went we got off I made sure to look and sure enough it was the same damn bus driver who had thrown us off. I guess he figures he doesn't get paid enough to help out the stupid tourists.

Sunday, fun day, we got up and headed over to San Giovanni in Laterano the first Christian church in Rome. Rose was essentially in charge of the Rome part of our trip since I had already been there and she is way more into all things Roman and this was one of her finds. As we're walking up the steps to the church I thought, it's Sunday, in Rome, sure hope there isn't a mass going on. Whaddayathink? Of course there was a mass since it was Sunday and it was Rome, duh. I told Rose I couldn't wander around the church with mass on and she agreed. (We got over this later since mass seems to be perpetually on in Rome but we didn't know that then. Again, duh.) So we went to mass and communion. It just seemed like the right thing to do at the time. It was a beautiful mass and made us both feel like bursting into tears. Too much beauty, too much Catholicism. Besides being the first Christian church this place's other claim to fame is that it has two statues in a canopy over the altar which contain the heads of the apostles Peter and Paul. Gee, kinda gross. I am fascinated by odd religious artifacts and this was a pretty good find but I prefer ones you can see from closer up. And not hidden by statues.

In a building across the street from the church are the Holy (why do I keep thinking magic?) Stairs. We both remembered stories of these from our childhoods; people go up them on their knees praying the whole time. The claim is that they are the stairs Jesus climbed in Pontius Pilate's house when he was condemned to death. New stairs cover the original ones or they would have been destroyed by all the knees. We wander in and they there were and there were the pilgrims kneeing their way up. When in Rome...I knew Rose was thinking the same thing so I ask, "So are we actually going to do this?" She says, "I think we have to." Then we notice the little gate to the stairs is closed and a sign gives hours and apparently the stairs had just closed for lunch. Thank the Lord! Our first day in Rome and we had already been saved! We didn't have to knee our way up the stairs!

Next stop was the colosseum but we couldn't get to it because the Rome marathon was circling it and the roads and crosswalks were all closed. Seems we hit quite the busy sports weekend in Rome. We walked back and forth until we finally found a place where they let us cross over to the Palatine Hill and we ran a few paces in the marathon as well just to have bragging rights. Patlaine Hill is an old castle ruin and is very ruined indeed. The most interesting part is looking down on Circus Maximus where the chariots used to race and is still identifiable as a former race track.

The marathon finally ended and we wandered over to the Colosseum which is right nearby. It is impressive and creepy. All these old killing places like this and Stonehenge bother me; the brutality outweighs the architecture. Lots of people had their kids with them and I wonder what they told them. Someplace we read in its first one hundred days (the grand opening) 2,000 people were killed there. What a claim to fame. They had gladiator matches, animal matches, gladiator/animal matches, mock navel battles where they somehow flooded the place (that kinda impresses me) and occasionally would just throw a criminal to the lions. On the bright side (I know I'll really searching for a silver lining here), the Romans apparently did not just feed Christians to the lions.

The Forum, which is also close by, is now fenced in and we were too late to get in but looked at it from outside through the fence which was good enough. More interesting ruins.

We took the train to Naples on Monday morning at 7:45 a.m. as planned. This was the trip within the trip. We left our luggage in the Rome hotel since we were only going to be gone for a night and only took purses with a change of clothes in them. Just outside of Naples the train stopped in a dark tunnel and we were both pretty frustrated waiting for it to get going again to the station when I noticed people boarding! I asked the guy next to me if it was Naples and he said, "Yes! Rush!" (I think he meant hurry.) So we leapt up and out of the train which was in the station and our car just happened to be at the end still in the tunnel.

Our plan was to go to Herculaneum first since it closes pretty early in March and then go back to Naples and see the Archelogical Museum which stayed open until 7 p.m. Clever gals that we are, we checked our purses in the baggage check at the station and only carried around little cloth shopping bags which made us our load very light for touring and also made us look more "local" and hopefully less appealing to the pickpockets everyone warns you about in that area. Our money and passports were safely in our money belts. It's the first time I've used one of those and think they are a great idea for travelling in pickpocket infested areas. One tourist walking near me got his wallet "pinched" (I think he was English) walking through the station.

We got the local commuter trian to Herculaneum (yes, named after Hercules) but almost missed that stop as well. You walk about 10 minutes through town and just follow the signs to the ruins. We had no idea what to expect. The old town is basically in a giant hole in the ground since it was buried by so much lava, ash, dirt, grass and trees over the years and it has literally been dug out. You can get into quite a few of the houses there although they are essentially empty since all the finds were moved to the museum for safekeeping. They had a pretty good audio guide and we spend a good couple of hours wandering around and feeling really sorry for all the people killed in the eruption of Vesuvius.

The commuter train back to Naples was about 25 minutes or so and then we used the guide book to take the subway to the area of the Archelogical Museum. Almost anything of value from both Herculaneum and Pompeii is in there and it is a LOT of stuff plus the Farnese Collection. The most "infamous" exhibit there is the "Secret Room" that contains a lot of old erotic artwork. There are lots of penises made out of pottery that apparently acted as good luck charms and pictures illustrating various sexual positions. Interesting, but there is definitely much more worthwhile stuff in the museum. It is definitely worth seeing if you are in the area to see the ruins because you get to see the statues, mosiacs, household goods, etc. that were found. The audio guide unfortunately stunk and they were out of guide books in English. Oh those Italians!

Our Rick Steves' guidebook had a "Slice of Naples' Life Walk" that we decided to take after the museum just as it was getting dark. We now affectionately refer to this as our "Slice of Death" walk but it really wasn't that bad except it got dark, started to rain, we didn't have a decent map only the sketchy one from the Rome guide (dumb mistake) and we were afraid to ask directions since we didn't want to get mugged although the people all seemed o.k. Aside from those issues, the main problem was the traffic. They drive like crazy both in cars and LOTS of Vespas, honk, honk, honk and sometimes we couln't figure out how to cross a street we needed to cross without risking life and limb. Rose says she noticied most of the cars were dented. I didn't notice that because I was trying not to get run over. No breaks, no brakes. After wandering around for maybe 45 minutes we eventually found a street listed in our guide and somehow miraculously found one of the local pizza places the guide recommended we try particularly as pizza originated in Naples. The place is called Antica Pizzeria da Michele. Rose was a bit taken aback when I told her she might as well get the margherita with mozzarella and I would get the marinara which is without cheese and we could try both since I normally let her make her OWN food choices but then I pointed to the menu on the wall. Those WERE the choices. So we each got a medium pizza and a beer for six euros and it was pretty clear (beer in bottle with plastic cup provided, brightly lit, crowded, effecient and hectic service) that we were not expected to tip. The pizza had an extremely thin crust, fresh ingredients and a smokey flavor which I think is due to the use of wood burning ovens. I have never had pizza like it before and it was really good but cooled off fast because the crust was so thin. It's juicy enough you needed to eat it with utensils but we are used to doing that in Germany as well.

We finally ended our death walk back at the train station. We had decided to spend the night in Pompeii instead of Naples because it sounded safer and then we could get an early start at the ruins the next day that way. So at the station we retrieved our purses and took the next train to Pompeii which is about 40 minutes away but a little less with the faster train we used. Rose felt bad because she had left the directions to our Pompeii hotel in Rome but I told her, no problem, we would ask at the station. So we get off the train and enter an almost completely deserted station only occupied by a homeless? alcoholic? druggie? guy that I didn't want to chat with so I hightailed it outside with Rose asking where I was going. "Outta there," I said. Another adventure! It was after 10 p.m., there was no one around, not even any of the hated taxis which even I might have been willing to use in that situation. "So what do we do now?" Rose asks. "I don't know," I responsded honestly although we knew our hotel was supposed to be just a two minute walk away. But where? I looked around and noticed a cafe next to the station. "We'll go in there, buy a cup of coffee, and then ask for directions." I prefer asking directions as a customer. Besides, the coffee was always great. The cafe was nice with just one normal looking guy and two staff in there. We stood at the bar for our coffees (like it France, it is cheaper in Italy to drink coffee standing up) and then asked, "Hotel Diana?". Our waiter went over to the guy at the cash register who looked like the owner and whispered in his ear. He smiled, motioned us over, and pointed through the glass door. There was the Hotel Diana sign a stone's throw away. We all burst out laughing. We probably would have seen it earlier if we hadn't been freaked out and had kept our wits about us. This time we were saved in Pomeii on our second vacation day. Thank God on Sunday we had prayed. (Couldn't resist the rhyme, or the "saved" reference again.)

What a nice hotel! WAY nicer than the one in Rome, of course now we were in what the French would call the "provinces" so for the same price you should get better quality which was the case. Nice female receptionist, 20something. Small bar where we had some of the cheap and delicious local red wine. When in Pompeii.... The receptionist was amazed at our minimal amount of luggage as we only had purses. She said we were lucky. I took it as smart. I felt proud. We were REAL travellers! (Funny what makes me feel good.)

Rose and I both were fascinated by the color scheme in the hotel. Blue, orange, purple, yellow and somehow it all came together and looked nice. The next day in Pompeii we got it; the decorator had mimicted the colors of the ruins. Very creative. And aestically appealing. I don't know why, such things are really not my strong suit.

We checked out in the morning and headed to the ruins. Not a long walk. We knew from somewhere (internet I think) that the town also had a nice basilica which we saw on our way to the ruins. There was also a tower with an elevator that belonged to the church but was not attached. So we stopped and the church was lovely. But I always like to go UP! So we wandered around until we found some actual nuns sitting in a hallway and we motioned UP and they motioned where to go to get the elevator to the bell tower. We wandered into the lift and a guy came running in and somehow indicated (Italians are just great communicators) we had to pay a Euro to take it up. So we paid up and he drove us up. And we saw new Pompeii, the ruins, the sea and Mount Vesuvius. Just the three of us. He indicated (like I said, great communicators) by kissing his hand to his lips that we happened on a day with an incredible view. And so it was. Clear as a bell. He also communicated that we should press a doorbell on the elevator to call him when we wanted to come back down. The breathtaking view, particularly with a completely clear view of Vesuvius which seems to be a somewhat rare, was stunning. This was one of our trip's highlights. And good to his word, we pressed the bell and he was Johnny on the spot to take us back to earth.

The Pompeii ruins have several entrances. We entered at a place where they didn't have audio guides. We wanted audio guides. So we basically walked through the entire ruins to the other side to get them. That is no small feat. The ruins at Pompeii are extensive and it probably took us close to a half an hour to get from one side to the other. Pompeii is much bigger than Herculaneum but not as many of the buildings are open. You could spend many, many hours there and we spent maybe six hours there ourselves including a break in the cafeteria. One of the most visited sites there is the brothel; like the "secret room" it was another demonstration of people's interest in all things sexual. There is some erotic art in there showing various sexual positions and a middle-aged American guy was looking at them giggleing like a 12-year-old. Again, the story of the place is actually horrifying as most of the prostitutes were slaves and naturally there against their wills. I suspect they were probably also children.

We eventually took the commuter train back to Naples and considered trying to walk to the harbor but it was raining pretty hard so we just had some pizza in the train station and then headed back to Rome on the train. Later several Germans told us there had been a big criminal raid in Naples that day but we didn't see anything of it although there generally seemed to be a large (and welcome by me) police presence in the station.

In order to get into the Borghese Gallery you need to make reservations in advance. It's easy to do on the internet and I had made our reservations for Wednesday at 11 a.m. But we needed to find something to do before that since we certainly didn't want to waste so much of the morning. So I handed Rose the map and told her to find something. She did and then some. About two blocks from our hotel she found Santa Maria Maggiore church with the extra bonus of the Church of Santa Prassede right nearby! Santa Maia Maggiore has several major religious artifacts including pieces from the manger of Jesus and a dead pope, out first in Rome. Pope Sixtus V is laid out for all to view in a see-through casket wearing his regal garb with some kind of silver mask covering his face. And apparently he has been dead since 1590! Creepy rating: very high.

The nearby Church of Santa Prassede has some of the best Byzantine-style mosiacs in Rome, according to our guidebook. A tiny chapel, about the size of a small kitchen, called the Chapel of St. Zeno (cool name, I need to look up the saint) has a ceiling covered in them. You have to put 50 Euro cents in a slot to get the lights to go on. In a tiny alcove, just off the small chapel, was a small stone post on display with this sign, "Flagellation Post of Jesus". Attached to it was a picture of Christ tied to a post being whipped. That was definitely something that made me go Hmmm. What an odd artifact.

Then we headed back to the train station, took the subway to the area of the Borghese Gallary, got lost but then got found and made it in plenty of time for our reservations. They want you there one half hour before your reserved time to pay for your tickets, check bags, etc. When we got our tickets the sign said the next available tickets were for the following Tuesday, six days away. This was in March. You only get two hours in the museum before they tell you to leave and let the next group in. Because of the short time we decided to pay 5 Euros for the guided English tour. That was in addition to the entrance fee which was 11 or 12 Euros, I don't remember which.

The Borghese is overwhelming and there is no way to see all of the art in there in two hours. No way. The tour guide was very good and showed us the highlights. Art by Bernini, Caravvagio, Titian, Raphael. Much great art. One of the paintings that impressed Rose the most was one of the BVM wearing a red dress by Caravaggio. If that sounds odd today you can imagine the reception it got back then. The museum is visually overwhelming and to Rose's and my taste, quite overdone. Art and marble everywhere. It is the visual equivalent of overeating. We felt like we saw too much. We were very grateful for the grass and trees outside on the grounds when we left. And the nasty underside to the collection is that parts of it were stolen outright or coerced from unwilling contributors, according to the guide. The guy who put most of it together was appointed a cardinal at 26 by his uncle the pope even though he wasn't a priest. Details, details.

Since it was only 1 p.m. we walked over to the Spanish Steps before heading to St. Peter's. Thirty years ago I accidentally walked up the stairs and into St. Peter's while the pope was giving Mass. (A friend and I were trying to see the Sistine Chapel, which we did eventually manage to find around the corner.) Those days are gone. Now you wait in a giant line to go through the metal detectors like at the airport. Sigh.

Since I generally prefer to be on top of churches instead of in them (closer to God ;-)) we immediately headed for the cupola. For 7 Euro you can take an elevator up a couple of hundred steps and then walk another 323. Or for 4 Euro you can walk the whole way. We'd already done quite a bit of walking so opted for the elevator plus 323 steps. This was extremely cool. Once you get off the elevator you can walk around on a balcony inside the dome and watch the people down below. There was a mass going on down below us. Then you start hiking up between the inner and outer domes. After awhile it gets pretty narrow as the outer dome curves into you from the left. Rose started to hyperventilate and I thought maybe the stairs were getting to her but she said, "claustrophobia!". And I thought, uh oh. She, and obviously I, did not know she even had it until that minute. She said it was just too narrow and small with no windows and I told her to stop talking about it because it would just make it worse. (Actually, her talking about it was making me feel it too and I didn't think it would be wise for us to have simultaneous panic attacks in the dome of St. Peter's Basilica.) Fortunately while there was other people in there it was not actually crowded, so I told her to leave some space between herself and the group in front of her and I lagged about five feet behind so she wouldn't feel crowded. She pulled herself together and we made it to the top and she is so glad she did because this was another highlight. You are up on the outside of the dome standing on St. Pete's and seeing Rome. It is really not to be missed. On the way down you can stop on the roof of the church where there is a small cafeteria and a sovenir shop manned by nuns. On the roof! Rose bought rosaries for her sisters on the roof of St. Peter's Basilica in Rome. Very cool. You get to see the giant statues on the church from the back. I would, however, not recommend trying to get up there in the summer when it would be hot and crowded.

We eventually made our way down and into the actual church. It is impressive but JUST TOO MUCH for my taste. It reminded us of the Borghese Museum and seeing them both in one day may have been a bad idea. I don't like that Baroque style much in any case, it just seems so overwrought. I find Gothic churches much more appealing. I believe we saw two more dead popes in there and I am really not sure if these are their covered bodies or just replicas. I don't get it. Lots of HUGE paintings and statues. The oppulance of it gave me more respect and appreciation for (and if there is nothing beyond this it means a lightning bolt got me) Martin Luther. (Yeah! Still here!) Michelangelo's Pieta is in here as well, not particularly prominently displayed, and is lovely.

We left St. Pete's, walked over Pont Sant' Angelo, continued on and promptly got lost again. We were trying to find the Trevi Fountain which we eventually did manage after again stopping for coffee to get directions. (It was self-serve and I managed to serve myself twice as much as Rose did. She just reminded me of that.) We walked a lot, took a bus a little and finally found it. The first time I saw the fountain was during daylight 30 years ago and I wasn't particularly impressed. It has more impact as night with the lights on. Yes, we did toss coins in.

What a day! Three churches, three dead popes, two major museums, manger bits, Christ's flagellation post and the fountain! After quite a wait, we hopped on a bus headed back to station, had dinner at a little place across the street, (grilled vegetables, pasta and red wine!) and collapsed.

Thursday was our last day in Rome and we planned on seeing the Vatican Museum with the Sistine Chapel at the end as our flight didn't leave until 7 p.m. We checked our bags at the station, took the metro and walked and found thousands of people in what looked like a never ending line. We probably should have come the previous afternoon. Apparently it is not so packed starting at about 1 p.m. as in the morning. And this was off season! Live and learn.

So we got in line and after awhile some guy came and offered us a tour for 40 Euros, no waiting he said. The admission is something like 13 Euro so we figured it would be worth the rest to get out of line and have the tour. So he practically ran us over to some office where we paid and waited maybe 15 minutes and eventually they took us and put us back in line! Now, we were farther ahead in line than we had been but I was still pretty angry. It took us maybe another 15 minutes to get in. The guide was a student and he was actually pretty good but I still felt ripped off. I wouldn't do it again but would rather try and get there at another time when it is less crowded if that ever really happens and use an audio guide.

Maybe it was good to have a guide because Rose and I might still be in there otherwise. So much stuff. Wonderful stuff. And you can't possibly see it all. But you want to. And the Sistine Chapel is waiting. I most enjoyed by School of Athens by Raphael which I remember from Art History class. It is a lot bigger than I expected.

The last time I saw the Sistine Chapel the ceiling was pretty dark. Now it's been cleaned and the colors are much more vibrant. However, I prefer Michangelo's statues which makes a certain amount of sense since he considered himself a sculptor. His painted women all look like guys (VERY muscular) with breasts attached. As a woman, I find this offensive. But it's cool to see, nonetheless.

After the museum we decided just to take the bus back to the train station, get our luggage and get out to the airport so we didn't miss our plane.

I will go back to Rome again sometime. There are a couple of other churches I still want to see (particularly St. Paul's and St. Clemente's) and I'd certainly go back up on the roof of St. Pete's even with the narrow 300+ stairs because it was so beautiful up there. I think there is more to see in Rome than in any other city I've seen. But I would not go in summer; too hot and crowded and it was already crowded in March. We spent about 700 Euros each on the trip including the flight but keep in mind we only have to get there from Germany and we are budget travelers. But that does also include our jaunt down to Naples, Herculaneum and Pompeii. And all our admissions to the museums, ruins, etc. We walked a lot and our feet were sore and we are pretty dedicated walkers. I wore leather walking shoes and Rose bought black sport shoes just before the trip. I think her choice was better because of the comfort. However, I would not recommend regular light colored sport shoes because those identify you pretty quickly as a tourist and that tends to make you a target for thieves. I generally prefer traveling independently but if you do not want to walk so much or if getting lost freaks you out some kind of organized tour might be more to your liking. Some kind of personal navigation system might help as well but then you risk getting it lost or stolen. And maps work well too. Just remember to bring one or pick one up at a tourist information office. Why didn't we do that in Naples? And a good guidebook is invaluable. We loved Rick Steven's Rome but you have to find one that matches your own travel philosophy. And wear a money belt and count your change.

Hopefully, the coins we tossed in the Trevi Fountain will do their trick and I'll manage to get back sometime. And you too, Rose. Heck, they worked last time as evidenced by this report. In the meantime, I think I'll have some red wine! Salute!